Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
Today, my little brother discovered that bears can be very territorial and will pee on things to keep others away. He took this new found information to heart and peed on various things in the house that he wanted for himself, including my laptop. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she met someone else on World of Warcraft. I've been paying for her subscription. FML
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