Today, I found out that one of my colleagues believes that aliens built the pyramids. No amount of logical reasoning or evidence has had any effect on his argument of, "but you can't prove they didn't." FML
Today, while flying home, two little girls started chanting, "We're all going to die." I'm an extremely anxious flyer. FML
Today, discovered that all the viruses I have gotten on my computer at work haven't been from anything I've done, but because my boss has secretly been using it after hours to download or watch porn so he wouldn't risk getting a virus on his own computer. I've lost 3 major projects due to this. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she didn't know we were actually dating. FML
Today, I found out the guys I live with have an ongoing contest to see if they can hit targets on the inside of the toilet lid with urine when they pee. I could forgive this in my seven-year-old son, but not my forty-year-old husband. FML
Today, I told my daughter that she wasn't allowed to eat in her room, so she sat at the table and glared at me for 10 minutes while she ate. She's 15. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the emergency room because my girlfriend thought it would be funny to superglue my penis to my thigh while I was sleeping. FML
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