Mademoiselle
Today, I came home from work to find the lock to my bike busted and my bike stolen. The worst part was a nicer bike was sitting right next to it without a lock. FML
Today, my husband, who's a recovering alcoholic, and I are on holiday with our kids. He's decided he can have a few drinks because he deserves "a holiday too". He doesn't see why this should ruin ours. FML
Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML
Today, I had an extreme panic attack in the middle of class. I interrupted another person's presentation, burst into tears, and ran out of class whilst everyone looked at me. FML
Today, I decided to bike to work. I normally forget the key to my lock, so I leave it out back and hope that nobody takes it, and nobody does. I finally remembered my lock key so I chained it up. After my 7 hour shift, I walk to the back only to find the lock had been cut, and my bike was gone. FML
Today, I accidentally poured milk into my bowl of chips. FML
Today, I woke up to a cat licking my face. I don't have a cat. I quickly put the cat out the front door and went back to sleep. When I woke up later, I remembered that I had agreed to take care of my sister's cat for a week. I looked out the door, but the cat is nowhere to be found. FML
Today, I was taking a bath after a long day at work. I closed my eyes and listened to music. My cat thought this was the perfect time to come out of his hiding spot and jump in the bath. Once he realized it was filled with water, he freaked out and dug his claws into my face. FML
Today, my friends were right about me being whipped. My girlfriend now has me setting an alarm for 3 hrs after she's fallen asleep, all so I can uncover her feet so she doesn't get too warm. FML
Today, I had to carry a 25kg bag of cement to an elderly customer's car because she refused to use a cart. "You're paid to work, so I'm gonna make you work." FML
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