Madame Utah, United States 9 ans En couple
Today, as it's my birthday, I was hoping for a nice present from my boyfriend. What did he get me? A PornHub account. FML
Today, when getting off the bus, the driver said he thought I was going to exit from the front. Without thinking, I responded, "Oh no, I'm more of a backdoor kinda girl!" FML
Today, I watched my fiancé ride off on my motorcycle with another girl. FML
Today, I saw my two-year-old son trying to floss his teeth. He was using an earthworm. FML
Today, I moved three hours away from my boyfriend for college. Even though he got accepted to the same school and had a job lined up in town, he decided not to come with me because the Internet at our apartment wasn't going to be fast enough for his gaming. FML
Today, I ordered two double cheeseburgers from McDonald's and asked for one of them without pickles so they would think I was ordering for two people. Both burgers were for me. FML
Today, I'm so broke that I'm thinking about using a glass of whiskey and a pair of pliers to pull out my broken wisdom teeth. FML
Today, a pharmacist slut-shamed me for taking birth control. I'm still a virgin, and I only take those pills to help with my acne and period cramps. FML
Today, I helped my orchestra teacher out and played with a double quartet for a faculty meeting. When it came time to introduce us, he called out the names of the seven other students and then admitted in front of everyone that he'd forgotten my name. I've been one of his top students for 3 years. FML
Today, I received my uniform for culinary school. I'm 5'4" and 110 lbs, and during sizing even an XS uniform swam on me. On the other hand, I need huge shoes for my size 10 feet. Apparently, the school decided to ignore my sizing sheet and simply give me standard medium uniforms and size 8 shoes. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he'd drive me to the jeweler's to pick out a ring. We drove there, I picked the ring, and the sales person rang it up. I glanced at my boyfriend, only for him to reply, "Well don't look at me!" FML
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