Niggarita

Today, my friend's son asked me how much coke costs in this place. I told him, "About a dollar?" He said, "Wow, that's really cheap for blow." He's 10. FML

Frustrated

Today, I listened to my roommate having sex from 3 a.m. until 6 a.m. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML