Jessie_bh

Today, I finally went on a date with my crush. When he kissed me goodnight, it made me think of a dying slug. FML

Today, I finally found out who has been sending me hate letters, it's my husband's ex-wife. They've been divorced for 7 years. FML

Today, I decided I was done waiting for my boyfriend to ask me to marry him, so we were cuddling in his bed and I asked him. He asked for a rain check. FML

Today, I found out my boyfriend's mother thinks I'm a loser and a scumbag. We haven't even met yet. FML

Today, I got all dressed up to go on a date with a guy. Upon getting to my house to pick me up, he told me he'd forgot to put on mascara, and asked if he could borrow some. FML