Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML
nicehotcupoftea
Mademoiselle
Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML
Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML
My body hates me
Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML