Kassidy Sievert

I excitedly told my roommate of FIVE years I was pregnant. Her response? “Wait. You’re a girl?”

Bad hair day

Today, I noticed a lady at work staring at me very intently. When she realized she had my attention, she made a sweeping gesture over her head and said, "Hair is like Trump!" FML

Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door in and shoves a police badge in my face, screaming for me to tell him "the path of Lemmiwinks". After a whole minute of me shitting my balls off, he bursts into laughter and tells me I've been pranked. I was too embarrassed to report him. FML

Today, just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse, a bird shat on my lunch. FML