girl_fml

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

Today, I was taking a piss at a urinal when a fly started harassing me. I got so annoyed, I tried to swat it. Didn't go too well. I ended up losing control of my stream, soaking the guy beside me. He busted my face in. FML