ItzGunRain

Today, my crush came into the gas station I work at and said, "Man, you look hot today!" Flattered, I thanked him. He replied, "No, I mean like hot and sweaty, like you've been working hard." FML

Meet the parents

Today, my girlfriend and I got caught doing it in her parents' bed by her mom. Instead of making me leave, they forced me to stay for dinner. FML