Monsieur
Today, a really cute guy sat across from me on the bus. He smiled at me, then tensed his muscles and lifted a heavy bag with one arm. Thinking he was trying to act "macho" to impress me, I rolled my eyes and threw him an annoyed/disgusted look. When he got off, I realized he only had one arm. FML
Today, I bought a pretty blue parakeet to keep my parrot company, and named her Sky. I went to work a few hours later. When I came home that night, I found my parrot dead. There wasn't a huge mess to clean, though; Sky had already eaten half of his corpse. FML
Today, my parents fought over who gets the dog when they divorce. Nothing has been said about where my brother and I will live when they split. FML
Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML
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