Today, I was added to a random group chat. They were planning to film a porno and each member sent a nude. They were all grannies. FML
Angelica Ballard
Madame Los Angeles
Today, I confided in my best friend about my recent weight loss, and how it was due to lack of appetite because of my horrible depression and anxiety. She congratulated me. FML
Panic
Today, I felt a painful lump on my jaw. After going on Google, I was convinced I either had an infected tooth or jaw cancer. In a panic, I rushed to the dentist and told the receptionist the problem. She pulled the dentist from an appointment, and he felt around my jaw. It was just a pimple. FML
Today, I had to explain to my Creative Writing teacher what an antagonist is. FML
Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML