dubhead4lyfe

Today, I learned to never shave your downstairs when you have the hiccups. FML

It's a sign!

Today, I went to the doctor because recently I've had a white liquid coming from my breast. I found out it's milk. I'm not pregnant. FML

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she met someone else on World of Warcraft. I've been paying for her subscription. FML

Today, it was my birthday. I got ONE birthday greeting: from my bank, telling me they were closing my account. FML

Terrible prank

Today, while I was in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been Facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

Today, I used my AA handbook as a beer coaster. FML

Today, my boyfriend asked me to play dead so he could have sex with my "corpse." FML