Today, I came home and found out that my new roommate, who smokes half a pack of cigarettes a day and drinks heavily 5 nights a week, had smashed my $300 bong because "weed is a horrible and deadly drug that will kill you slowly." FML
meshee03
Mademoiselle some place, with some people En couple
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try something new. I ended up tied to the bed, and my girlfriend discovered how ticklish I am. Worst 3 hours of my life. FML
David Attenborough
Today, my boyfriend decided he was going to narrate everything I do. I can't get him to stop. FML
Today, a woman asked why my daughter doesn't look remotely like me. I just smiled and shrugged it off, but the truth is that she looks exactly like I did before I got my botched plastic surgery. FML
Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML