tinyalmeida

Today, my mum was in a bad mood, so I tried to cheer her up by telling her I love her, and giving her a hug. She slapped me hard enough to leave a red, hand-shaped mark on my face, and told me to fuck off with my "sarcasm". FML

Today, I gave birth to a baby girl. Where was my husband after the agony finally ended? Standing just outside the room, flirting with a nurse. FML