Today, I saw my cat attacking a suitcase under my bed for apparently no reason. I laughed and picked it up to show him that there was nothing there, only to find a huge wasp hiding under it. FML.
Today, while cleaning out my daughter's closet, I found my missing dildo. It's a mold of my husband's penis. FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch when my cat decided that the top of my head was the perfect height to use as a springboard to get up to the cat climbing tree. She had her claws out for traction. FML
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